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So elevation has a physiological component and motivational one too. However, unlike the Big Six emotions, it does not have an obvious characteristic facial expression, which may explain why it has slipped under the research radar for so long. If you appreciate the context, you may be able to detect a slight softening of the features, says Haidt. Sometimes the eyebrows are raised as if the person is sad.
Because of this, she feels that taking any sort of bodywork class is a step in the right direction. “Learn basic massage or take an acting or improv course where you have to be the observer and the observed,” she advises, “or anything you can do to increase awareness without judgment.” Jodi feels that’s the key to being empathically accurate—learning to pick up on information about someone else without adding your own bias. Seeking out new experiences is a great place to start. “Just read other things outside of who you are to see how people are in the world,” she says. “Look around for things that aren’t like you, and be observant.”
When talking with her friends about issues in their lives, Jodi tries to show them different options without trying to “fix” things. Sometimes people just need to vent, rather than having solutions presented to them, and she tries to find a balance between the two. “That’s just what a good friend does,” Jodi explains. “A good friend listens and is present in the way she’s needed to be.” This is why good empaths find a way to stay within themselves while reading others—they need to be objective enough to see the situation fully, but emotionally connected enough to see where that person is within it. Above all, being able to really listen is a powerful tool for mind reading. A 1999 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that empathic accuracy is more dependent on verbal clues than on things like body language or even context.
You were good to go when he smiled at you," Lazzara said.
On his first day of preschool this fall, Danny folded his hands and told his teachers, "I just want to learn."
Preschool's most important lesson is how to socialize. Danny already had that down cold. He got along with all the kids and seemed to make the most of every day.
"You never had to entertain Danny. He was content being by himself, or with people," Marske said.
The preschoolers keep journals, dictating to the teachers about the topic of the day. Danny's last entry was about what he was thankful for at Thanksgiving. Other kids said, "food," or "Happy Meals." Danny talked about his family.
"I'm thankful for Mom, Dad, Tommy, John, Mary Grace. I'm thankful for my toys. My mom and dad help me when my brother tackles me."
The Friday night before Danny's fatal seizure, the Duffys were over with their two boys to watch a Christmas special on TV. Mary brought a big chocolate castle cake, and Danny and the other kids playfully tore off the towers to eat first, then ditched the TV special and clamored downstairs to build a fort in the basement.
There, they discovered a hidden bag full of unwrapped Christmas presents, including the one Danny wanted most of all.
Danny came upstairs, and with a twinkle in his eyes, playfully announced, "Hey Dad, I'm glad I'm getting that remote control car for Christmas."
The next morning, Danny was gone. His parents found him in bed, his lips already blue.
He'd had occasional seizures for two years, always at night, always while sleeping, always frightening. After the first one, he slept in his parents' bed for six months. Doctors did tests, put him on medication, found nothing else wrong and said he might outgrow the problem.
Seizures, electrical disturbances in the brain, affect roughly 1 percent of all children. Dr. Douglas Nordli, an epilepsy specialist at Chicago's Children's Memorial Hospital, said most otherwise healthy young children do outgrow them; deaths are extremely rare. Causes of these sudden, unexpected deaths are uncertain; it may be that brain signals for proper breathing get short-circuited, or the heart rate becomes too faint to get blood to vital organs.
"Danny's day-to-day behavior gave no indication of anything wrong with him," Mike Stanton said. "How many seizures did he have that we did not know about? We checked in on him thousands of times while he was sleeping."
It’s important to realize that empathic interference is a skill that should be used with discretion—we need to respect people’s desire to keep things to themselves. But mind reading isn’t about forcing someone to talk about his or her problems or spill a few secrets; it’s just a way of being more aware of the people around you. Trying to understand yourself and others better has the potential to improve not only your relationships, but your own sense of well-being, too. As Jodi puts it, “People who want to increase their empathic accuracy just need to take steps to be more present and happy in their life in general. When they take those steps, everybody benefits.”
Elevation is also relatively rare. People typically experience it less than once a week, although there are wide individual differences. Where it does score, though, is in being highly significant. "If you ask people to remember their most cherished experiences of their whole life, elevatory moments are likely to feature in their top five," says Haidt. What's more, if we can harness elevation to build trust, it could have particular relevance in the modern world for strengthening or repairing personal relationships. Haidt envisages a time, for example, when marital therapists might try to induce it so as to enhance the effectiveness of couples' counselling sessions.
Cowell has just donated $160,000 to save the life of 18-month-old Sophie Atay from Gateshead in the United Kingdom.
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The little girl will be flown to the Unites States for pioneering treatment at the Memorial Hospital in New York.
The multi-millionaire music mogul stepped-in after learning that her family had to raise $800,000 to pay for treatments last week after they were told their daughter was suffering from a rare form of Neuroblastoma and needed treatment within days.
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Singer Alexandra Burke -- who won the UK’s X-Factor last year -- phoned Sophie’s mother Karine Atay, 33, to tell her that Cowell had decided to help them financially.
“Karine did not know what I was going to tell her,” revealed Burke. “So when I broke the news we were both crying -- but I was crying more than Karine -- she told me that she had been listening to my song Hallelluiah on the way to the hospital.
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I had told Simon about the situation and that there was no time to waste because Sophie needed treatment immediately -- and he decided to give the money in a second. Now, we are hopeful that Sophie will be on the flight to the U.S. today.”